There are some times in life when you wish you could control your feelings and your thoughts and you visualize yourself sitting in front of the mac trying so hard to get rid of certain thoughts and feelings and emotional rushes that all you can do is run to the bathroom to lock yourself up and vomit because you can’t hold it all inside – well, not all at the same time, if it happens to be so much.
Controling oneself often seems to hard to handle and most of the times you have to face reality admiting that certain things, happenings, phone calls or messages just make you throw up in order of being able to cope with them properly and adequately … and somehow, one step at a time throwing up is turning into a routin and swallowing all the shit that is in your head is the only thing available to do anymore. At least for the last 18 years and possibly the next 40 to 50. If you will make it that far.
Oh please, do not believe, that I am talking about anorexia or bulimia because these kind of things are too off limit for myself because I love my body and bla bla you have heard the shit and it is true – believe me. I love to eat and keep it in me, actually. But time and events have it that you have to deal with certain facts in life.
Take it or leave it. Ha Ha.