Mr.StrictlyIntimate

the Life, the Love and the Sex of Vienna.

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Mr.StrictlyIntimate Meets…


…Playmate November 2012 – Clivia Treidl

Clivia Treidl Playboy November 2012

Thomas Fiedler for Playboy 11/2012

I always try to re-invent myself in a lot of ways. For my blog that means a variety in content and of course, sometimes even with the layout. For a couple of weeks now I am studying Journalism for a Master’s degree and I have come to the task of doing an interview. This time it wasn’t like the 5 minutes 2 questions interview with Nelly Furtado I did about 2 months ago in Berlin and loved like hell. This time it was more elaborate. It had to be. I thought about whom to interview and so many interesting people came to my mind. I did a variety of interviews and have decided to show them all here – for you to read and for you to reach.

I’ve spent hours preparing questions and hours trying to figure out who Clivia Treidl (25 – studying Media Studies) might be as a person; as a woman; as a model and as a playmate.

Date: October 28th, 20012
Time: 10.00 am
Location: Starbucks, 1st district Vienna, Austria
Drink: Clivia is having a soy cappuccino; I am having an espresso doppio and earl grey tea.

Mr.StrictlyIntimate: What does the name ‘Clivia Treidl’ represent? Please, describe yourself in three words – professionally as well as in private.

Clivia Treidl: Professionally… Clivia Treidl. Mhm… I would say ambitious, determined and patient. In private: a little bit chaotic, sensitive and a good friend.

Mr_SI: Apart from modeling, do you work besides studying? Can one survive from modeling in Austria?

C_T: By now I am just doing model and hostess jobs. Back then I also did some waitressing and other jobs. Like internships in PR and things like that. But at the moment I am only taking on model jobs and hostess jobs. That works out all right currently.

Mr_SI: Did you always know that you wanted to be a model? Or, did this idea come to mind during your time studying in Vienna?

C_T: To be honest, it was never my plan to become a model. If you are 5’5″ you do not think about such a career path. It just happened and the moment I saw the first pictures of me I thought, ‘Well, maybe this could work out.’ But I do not feel a pressure about it – either it works or it doesn’t.

Mr_SI: One of the most important questions that came to my mind is, how does a model who has worked in exclusively in fashion before actually become a Playboy girl?

C_T: Personally, I have always preferred the revealing shoots. I have never been completely naked in a shoot before but I have always felt like drowning in clothes in a lot of shoots. In the fashion industry it is not very welcome to be nude in shoots – except if it is for VOGUE.

Every now and then, when being at castings you get to meet someone who has been in Playboy once and well, you get to talk and you just pop the question. Girls really do send pictures to Playboy and so did I. The next day I got a call. One thing led to another and I found myself at a casting and two years later I am Miss November 2012.

Clivia Treidl Playboy November 2012

Thomas Fiedler for Playboy 11/2012

Mr_SI: I can hear the ambition in your words…

C_T: Exactly. I was just curious. During the casting process I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to do it – to actually take of my clothes for Playboy. I just wanted to test my chances and check on how far I’d come. Then, when they chose me the actual deliberations started.

Mr_SI: I assume it was an ‘Ego-Thing’ – How far do come? How do others see me? Do others see me the way I see myself?

C_T: Yes, the whole model industry is basically about the Ego. Maybe it dissolves with time but in the beginning it definitely has a lot to do with Ego. Not with those rare girls who are discovered on the streets, that’s definitely something else. But with those deciding on becoming a model it most certainly has something to do with Ego: Am I good enough? Do I look good enough?

Mr_SI: Would you describe yourself as someone utterly satisfied and happy with their reflection in the mirror, knowing that the one person looking back at you is someone you can smile at saying, ‘Yes, that’s me and that’s great.?’

C_T: By now, yes, absolutely. But that hasn’t always been the case. I have always been rather the shy, precarious person between two extremes: One day, perfectly self-confident and happy. The next day, completely unsatisfied and unhappy and so not at peace with myself.

There were times when I thought that changing parts of my body to fit my own imagination of what’s ideal would be the solution. Just to look the part. Obviously, I have had something done. One can see that my breast are not real and I have often been criticized for that.

Mr_SI: Would you say your breasts have been a hindrance for Playboy?

C_T: They were more of a hinderance than they were of help.

Mr_SI: Why do you think that having fake breasts was a problem for Playboy? What kind of image does Playboy want to develop with the women they feature?

C_T: The concept I see, as a student of media studies is the image of the beautiful neighbor. The girl, or woman who is reachable to any kind of guy rather than the diva who is distanced and not approachable.

Mr_SI: Do you like the pictures that have been chosen for the magazine?

C_T: I have to say that I am very, very happy with the selections. For the magazine they most certainly have picked the best pictures available and I couldn’t be happier about the results. They illustrated me the way I wanted to show myself – sensual, natural, surrounded by bright colors, not too provocative. Just beautiful.

Clivia Treidl Playboy November 2012 I

Thomas Fiedler for Playboy 11/2012

Mr_SI: How was the shooting behind the scenes? Where did they shoot you? Did it take you a long time to prepare – not just physically but also mentally?

C_T: The shoot was at Mallorca. In a beautiful house. The team was amazing. We did the shoot by day – very relaxed and without pressure to get more and more pictures done. And in the evening we went out for dinner together. It really took of the edge.
The two months before the shooting I was very nervous. I told myself that I would be at my best possible physique and that I would be fit as never before. In fact I was so nervous that I ate more than usual and I haven’t been at the peek of a model’s physique but as you can see in the pictures it helped me to underline my own femininity. WITH those few extra pounds.

Mr_SI: How did you experience the moment of realizing, ‘Okay, I am taking of my clothes now and in a couple of months thousands of people can see me fully nude?’

C_T: I actually never had such a moment. In fact, during the whole shoot I was desperately waiting for that one moment when the whole situation would become ridiculously unpleasant and weird to me. But it never did. The team was awesome and I felt really great about myself. I think it would have been weird for me if the pictures wouldn’t have turned out to be that great. THAT would have been unpleasant, knowing that there would be thousands of issues of Playboy magazine with pictures of an uncomfortable and unhappy me in them.

Mr_SI: My final question – seeing you in the pictures one could describe you as a ‘Femme Fatale.’ Would you yourself say that you are a Femme Fatale in private? Or rather a shy, calm, not tantalizing woman?

C_T: Mhmm… I guess I have both of these sides in my personality. I like Femme Fatale – that’s a good description because it is exactly the opposite of who I was way back when I wasn’t a model. Rather a shy plain Jane.
But by now I have overcome this shyness and especially when going out like to be consciously sexy and a little bit provocative from time to time. Still, I have a lot of the shy girl in me. But from time to time I like to be a Femme Fatale.

Playboy Cover November 2012

Wolfgang Zajc for Playboy 11/2012

The latest issue of Playboy Magazine featuring Clivia Treidl will be available until the middle of November.
More pictures of Clivia Treidl, Playmate November 2012 can be found on www.playboy.de.

To me it was an amazing start into a wonderfully productive Sunday, sitting together with Clivia talking on and off topic about everything that has been going on in our lives since we last saw each other about two years ago. She is a very relaxed, wonderfully funny and beautiful woman. This interview couldn’t have been any easier and more fun than this.

XOXO

Mr.StrictlyIntimate

Berlin, Berlin…you are so wonderful Berlin – can I come back to you again and will you embrace me then? [Season Finale]


Happening right now: I am sitting at Starbucks while it is raining in the streets of Vienna – drinking my usual triple shot latte macchiato with soy milk – extra hot and typing this lines in remembrance of a wonderful vacation and a hard’n’heavy road trip that made a lot of fun… so here is what everyone has been waiting for since I have started writing the journey… the End.

Sunday 17th – 4:35 pm

I sit here at the airport waiting for the boarding of my flight back to my home country Vienna… it was an adventurous trip in Berlin…three days… and above all I forgot my fucking ID…the one thing everyone actually needs when traveling out of the boarders of their home country. I really wonder how I could have been that silly because everyone who knows me perfectly well is aware of the fact that I never forget anything if it is important. But well as it seems even I have my little flaws. Or some big issues as well as it turned out when K and I were talking more intimate than ever before on Thursday – the night before ‘road trip’-ing to Berlin, but please, let me start at the beginning of these three days.

Thursday – night. 11.30 pm (actually right after coming home from cinema watching Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part II). The house of K and her mother C. The night before traveling to Berlin.

We sat in the garden with a glass of wine and some salad her mother made for our journey. I knew that this talk would be more deep from the moment on K said ‘Hey, I think we have to have a little talk – I need to tell you some things’. As it turns out this was more like some kind of therapy lesson for me as well as for her for I told her everything about me. Things no one ever made me tell. Things that were hidden as deeply as they hurt for they nevertheless were past and therefore and something I actually mostly try to forget or just forgive from time to time. It was something , I have never told anyone before for I did never believe that theses secrets would matter anyhow at any given point of time. But as it turned out they mattered more than I even dared to believe myself.
Non the less I will not talk about this stuff here and now because it is pre-self-respective-me-time and pre-self-conscious-mrstrictlyintimate. This blog is a future forward, new age thinking diary for me, a platform where I talk about everything that happens here and now or maybe even in some time ahead but right now, it doesn’t really feel like being right to me to talk about private past stuff. Maybe in a book one day. I do believe this would be the perfect material for a book about the hidden depths of a human psyche.

As I sat there with K talking my heart and my soul out I wondered if I should stick to my usual motto – if two can keep a secret then one of them is dead – but I decide that I couldn’t trust K any more than I already do so I just talk and talk and talk. And it somehow feels really good.

Friday 6:00 am – the early bird catches the worm – the early Mr.StrictlyIntimate catches everything AFTER he got his seven cups of coffee and wears a glittering and glamorous outfit.

C brings us to the train to Regensburg where we will meet up with someone who is a complete stranger to the both of us found by K on a website called mitfahrgelegenheit.de but as it turns out this is the kind of stuff everyone does in our society. Several people told me about this site and I have to admit that it felt weird to wait for someone you do not know at all driving you to a destination without making you a slave or a prostitute. It is actually quite refreshing that there still are somewhat trustworthy people out there.

We arrived in Berlin with a few stops and well we were alive and our driver actually has been a pretty nice guy – so no complaint just pure joy we actually made it to Berlin. Once we got out of the car and said goodbye to Fritz (yeah right – some joking automatically aroused because of the name and a certain Austrian guy everyone around the world knows by know starting with Fritz and ending with -l…but I do not give any hints here who it actually is.)

Annemarie (thank God we met Annemarie – a wonderful, sparkling, bright and so fashionable young woman) picked us up to bring me save to her home (in Potsdam – so beautiful!) and to give me the opportunity to get rig of clothes and jumping into a new pair of Levi’s Jeans, a white Diesel T-Shirt, my gray Zara cardigan and my black satin Petar Petrov Jacket adding my Swarovski crystal necklace and my Boxfresh sneakers to complete the outfit. I looked good and I was ready to be taken to a fantastic, open minded and entertaining party – a student party! The best I have ever had but that could have been the shot of adrenaline being produced by the thought of me finally being in Berlin – whole, alive and all dressed up in hot couture.

Saturday: 4.15 am – on the way home. Well, hers not mine. Of course.

Though I have been up for almost 24 hours I have to say that I do not feel any kind of exhaustion yet but just the thrill of what is coming up to us on the next day of visiting Berlin.
Once we entered the Berlin scenario of living and eating and breathing and dressing I happened to meet a point where I inadequately realized that everything is more fashionable in Berlin – that everything rocks and everyone glams and everthing else just had a fucking awesome attitude. I felt great and I felt so at home (though realizing I forgot something actually very important for my way back home to Vienna – my fucking passport where I look like a fucking overdressed Nazi – though I actually do not quite know why, but with the bold head and the jacket that looks like a bomber jacket on the picture one could actually mistake me for someone that I am absolutely not – above all… why do they had to put the Austrian stamp right over my bright pink tie?! I believe this tie would have saved everything bringing me back to the all gay – all good – all harmless spotlight!).

As we sat in a restaurant for dinner K, AM and her friend tried to enlighten my mood which swung from overwhelmingly lucky being in Berlin to calling my self a fucking idiot for forgetting something as essential as my passport – it did not help, though I felt calmer and better after talking to the embassy and the police – who both ensured me that I will somehow make it to Vienna (even if they had to hid me in a Burberry Suitcase – well it is not what they said, but that is what I have heard and imagined from their words!).

Saturday: 9.00 pm – ready to party the gay way? Well, no. Not quite.

As we decided, when I arrived in Berlin, that we definitely had to pay a visit to the gay scene, we were all as keen as mustard to check out the hot guys. But then, in the end we did not because we decided that we should use the last night in Berlin to order Pizza, talk about stuff like fashion, makeup and weird friends that were just being made and born for our own amusement. And so we sat and laugh and ate the grossest Pizza I have ever heard of that turned out to be the best one I have ever had in my mouth… guys. Still talking about pizza here and it was a hot dog pizza – Pizza base with sausage, onions, cocktail gherkin and mustard. Damn that was delicious.

Sunday: 1.30 am – still wide awake. Just me. But anyhow being awake doesn’t change its status just because I was all by myself though one might have been able to call it a single night in bed – just like every night seems to be but who complains?

Sunday: 12.00 pm – Brunch with Phil Meinwelt, AM and Richard. So funny, so entertaining and so delicious. I believe the four of us had the nicest brunch one could have. I definitely have to point out that AM is the funniest girl I have ever met in my entire life. She is a born entertainer.
After eating and after a big fauxpas made by the waiter… when we paid he really looked at me and seriously asked ‘do you pay lonesome’ – I looked at him unsure of either to slap him or to say ‘honey, in the evenings my bed never is lonesome!’ … but I went for – I pay on my own because I am able to afford everything I want since I am a hard working single gay guy waiting for anyone to show up trying to show him that love isn’t just a fucking made up myth created by Walt Disney to keep us entertained while struggling with life so NO I do not pay lonesome I pay fucking happy SINGLEISH! Well, I did not say that either. But in my head I did. And my friends saw this in my eyes. I paid. We left. For good.

Sunday 3.10 pm – saying goodbye with a heavy hard. It is time for me to say goodbye to little K and her wonderful friend Lilly! AM and I go to the airport, me breathing hard not being sure if I make it through to the gate because of my missing passport but as it turns out the guy at the check in doesn’t give a fucking fuck about my missing passport and is perfectly satisfied with seeing my driving license letting me take my flight back to Vienna.

And there I am now. Vienna. Back again. But not for long I guess. I do believe.

XOXO

Mr.StrictlyIntimate

P.S. Knowledge of the Day (no not that day but today): Never forget your umbrella at home…you might get wet surprise. XO

the Adjustment Bureau: Visualizing the Great Plan of Life or ‘Is There Someone Leading Us Into a Right Direction’?!


It is a rainy Sunday afternoon (gosh how I love such rainy times when I am able to sport my beautifully crafted trench coat in the most fashionable manner) and I am sitting at Starbucks sipping on my second triple grande latte macchiato with soy milk (extra hot!) while booking my flights and checking the hotels I am about to stay in when I come to go on my first real vacation in five years! I can’t believe that I have finally managed to reschedule some things and appointments in order to finally meet myself in a relaxed kind of way – a way I actually never got to meet myself in a couple of years now. And since I am spending my trip with my beloved K I know that it is going to be both – great fun and a big bang tour!

Nevertheless, I remember, sitting all by myself thinking about life and love and about the people surrounding me (just like I always do when I totally enjoy some alone time – just me, myself, my music, my MacBook, my Phones and I) watching the Adjustment Bureau yesterday and so I irrevocably come to think about life as a big mixture of chances and something that is called the big plan. A plan that shows how a certain human being develops throughout his or her life but always heading into a direction that was written down for them centuries ago or at the point they were born – there are several ideas on that. Non the less I come to think about THE great plan and if there is such. Is there such? Do you believe in something like a big grand plan that wrote down what will become of you before you knew it yourself? Do you believe that some people are simply meant to be just because it was written down somewhere? Do you believe there is the ONE person that was meant to be for you? Created to fulfill their own kind of goal but still being an important and life changing part in everything you do and everything that has been created for you – made up for you as something that seems to be a map of various directions with one particular way to go in a particular direction? Is there a possibility of going only one way and no way else? One direction? Straight ahead? Doesn’t that sound rather one dimensional and above all quite silly?
(And an even better question: Why does Emily Blunt always looks that stunning without seemingly trying hard – what is it with her that she just appears to be perfectly beautiful without any effort? Makes me jealous actually!)

Well, since I neither believe in fate nor in a great plan written down for each and every human being in a customized way I also doubt the theory of one particular person existing to change your life irrevocably and incontrovertibly. In my own opinion there is not just one right one for you – there are millions of people existing on this planet so how anyone in their right mind can believe that in these millions of people only one was meant to be for you and just for you?! Seems a bit narrow minded considering the availability of hearts to conquer or people to impress in order to get a date or to have sex or to maybe have a serious commitment to any of those bespoken millions of people, doesn’t it? Though there were times back when I was young and foolish and poorly naive when I believed in things such as the one or the only right person for you or something like eternal love or something like happily ever after I have to admit that I am kind of happy that I met a point of waking up to see the rampant reality of us committing mostly because we can’t bear to be alone or can’t cope with the thought of possibly being alone until the end of our living days. I have been de-romanticized by the harsh and unfair life we live on a daily basis, by daily routine and by people showing me that true love is something the mind created centuries ago to make living easier because you have created yourself a thought to live for instead of really living for something that makes you happy, that fulfills you and your needs and that is simply something you always wanted to achieve… and to be honest I am glad it happened to me (I am still talking about being de-romanticized, of course) because if it wouldn’t have I might still be rushing through this world searching for someone that simply does not exist. Never mind the fact that society wants us to be with someone in order to appear as a ‘normal’ kind of human being, whatever ‘normal’ is in this society.
I wonder if it will ever be accepted for people to officially declare that they are single and that they actually enjoy to have it that way without people judging instantly and secretly and sometimes too obvious to hide?

Back to my thoughts on the master plan and the way the film created it to be in my head somehow – if there is something like an Adjustment Bureau (and yes I am completely taking the thought transferring it into our society!) leading people onto their ways the way it was written down for them by a high inspector (we all know who is meant by that, don’t we?!) then why do some people lose themselves in addictions and diseases and fights and mass murders? Why do people obviously can go the wrong way if there is someone leading them into a certain direction? Or is this film really trying to pinpoint that some people are just meant to be drug addicts or alcoholics or murderers or rapers? I dearly hope it does not. And if it (the film) does mean to say so than I truly hope the grand plan means something different for me than becoming more sarcastic and cynic that I already am not leading me into temptation such as drug addiction or trying to be with someone that is highly inappropriate for me. Until my researches on whether something like a grand plan exists I have to say that I decide for myself to not be tempted believing that everything will turn out the way it is supposed to be but keeping on working as hard as I possibly can to achieve everything I have set in mind.

Therefore, work your asses of because one day it will all pay off because you deserved it and not because you believe it is meant to be!

XOXO

Mr.StrictlyIntimate

P.S. Knowledge of the Day: Rain suits my wardrobe and me better than any sunny day could. I can’t let go of trench coats and cardigans. I simply can’t. XO

Viva Forever: the Power of being Yourself!


I am in the middle of what I would call a Spice Girls revival – in my head and on my MacBook everything that makes a sound is like an homage to the 90’s back when Geri, Mel B, Mel C, Emma and Victoria where the greatest female artists in the world – nut just for myself but for a crowd of millions of girls and boys (mostly gays) and still they are like heros for me. What they have achieved in a world where men always lead the way was not just an inspirations for all those girls but still is for hundreds of artists in the growing.

This is the perfect song to say goodbye to a nice weekend with my best friend K who did not just invite me to take part in a great trip to the Austrian Shoe Museum but also gave me the chance to meet a group of new wonderful people from Berlin who are sassy, sexy and cool – my girls you know I speak of you!
Yesterday the group of us – including K’s absolutely perfect boyfriend W who gets along with every one of us more than a boyfriend actually could be expected to (thanks to making such a great choice K!) – was invited to attend the annual Shoemaker’s Ball and it was a great experience coming to terms with meeting myself a little bit more closely in realizing that I am actually not the typical gay as everyone would describe it. Even though you can see the pink aura from a million miles away when I walk past you there is still a big male factor in moi (saying ‘moi’ sounds actually quite gay when I think about it more precisely).

When I was sitting with W in the smoking lounge – smoking our cigars, talking to him – man on man I have realized that I am not just gay. I am a man and that is what I stand for. So do not try to talk me over by saying I’m girlish because I am definitely not! I am a man and I love to be a man – and that is why I can handle a friendship to straight guys better than I could ever do with a gay guy. It disgusts me to see them playing a role of what they think they should be instead of simply being who they are.

Something that I have learned while listening to the Spice Girls – even though their main message might be ‘Girl Power’ this message perfectly fits into our society and our culture that is developing steadily and rapidly. It is not just about girl power or gay power… it is about POWER after all – the power to stand up and speak for yourself, the power to be who you really are (even then when others look at you and might laugh – happens to me often, believe me), the power of waking up in the morning and feeling happy being alive, the power of looking into a mirror and seeing yourself and not a facade, the power of being independent because no one owns your heart but yourself, the power of conquering the world in your own shoes and writing your own story!

That’s their message and that is how I am going to start in a whole new week! A new state of mind – a new state of grace – and above all a renewed will to write my own big, slashing, fucking awesome story!

XOXO

Mr.StrictlyIntimate

Viva forever, I’ll be waiting
Everlasting, like the sun
Live forever,
For the moment
Ever searching for the one.
[Lyrics by Spice Girls – Viva Forever]

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